"What are those two doing?", Hiro ask his fellow judge Hyoma.
"Playing baseball," Hyoma reply.
"But don't baseball involve one hitting the ball and the other running around the diamond shape field?," Hiro ask Hyoma while consulting an 'idiots guide to baseball', "Not a female alchemist using a dragon emperor as the ball."
"Don't ask me ask them."
"So does this mean she won?, Hiro ask again."
"Yes, she won," Hyoma answered while watching the bizzare baseball match going on.
X who also happens to be the judge cut her off, "Yes its normal here. You'll get use to it"
Seriously, Lulu? She gets hit once and then the doctors have a whole lot of belt buckles to open before beginning the process of ogling her and stitching her back together.
It's a well known fact that Lambda's true power isn't seeing the future, but crying. What's less known is how this power translates into his legendary ability to avoid blows.
You see, without realizing it himself, Lambda's tears give him unparalleled peripheral vision. The reflective and refractive qualities of his manly waterworks give him multiple angles on any incoming attack from anywhere but directly behind him, and after years of learning to fight under these conditions, Lambda actually learned to correctly read these myriad motion.
Unfortunately for him, the Cloud of Darkness easily circumvents this impressive, if somewhat demeaning, talent. Because, of course, she's hardly limited to attacking from a single direction. A betentacled warrior such as herself can, while attacking from the front, also attack from the side, from above, from directly behind. Faced with nightmare assault from every direction, Lambda lost all control of his power and blinded himself completely with his tears, in fact losing all ability to react whatsoever. Not that his usual talent would have been useful against, y'know, nightmare tentacle rape, but it would have probably been a bit less embarassing.
Cloud of Darkness: 27
As Forgiver Sign began to take shape
Riou knew that Heat would not escape
But he gloated too soon
For just half a True Rune
Couldn't stand against tentacle *SHOT*
Artea is nimble.
Artea is quick.
Artea is too smart to fall for a predictable backstabbing trick.
As chance would have it, the cleaning crew for that arena went on strike and refused to clean up blood. Under most circumstances, security would beat them into compliance but the janitors had managed to gain the support of Ryu3, Lamington, and even Myria.
Zophar and Sephiroth: We can take them. HAHAHA...
And the armies of Lamington and Myria, by extension.
Necron: You voted to boot me. Don't expect me to help.
The judges worked out an alternative in the end. Setting up the arena for laser tag, spectators watched the duelers scurry around like mice in a maze as Artea won by a 26-0 score. So Rofel still gets zapped, the crowd is still entertained, and the cleaning crews are happy.
A beautiful, mysterious widow.
A young man with a long, hard sword.
Wait, haven't we heard this story?
Yuri rolled his eyes "Aunt Saki, you really have to stop throwing fights to every guy with a Freudian weapon. It's not going to win them over."
Saki laughed. "Oh, I don't expect that. I just think they should be rewarded for showing a nice old woman such a good time."
Yuri facepalmed. "Why can't I know anyone normal..."
Saki Inugami: 10
Ness shows us that even with the prohibition in effect you can't keep a man down. The Sherriff with his six shooter still falls before the might of a baseball bat to the cranium. Billy was found the next day with his brain case shattered, grey matter sprawling across the footpath and a signatory note offering the finder one Policeman's dignity.
An avian legend of ice
And a sorceress(who's occasionally nice)
Spells of Death and Reflect
Made the fowl suspect
That his powers just wouldn't suffice
Two old men thought it might be fine
To give their drinking skills a moment to shine
But L.C. Chan did not think
As he started to drink
That old Gaffy would poison his wine
Long Chan Chan: 18
Normally, if there's one thing that Fire Emblem swordmasters are good at, it's chipping past physical limit fighters. Like, say, Cid Highwind. But sometimes, even these paragons of speed and grace drop the ball and flub things up just a bit.
Of course when the "mistake" that Guy made was to accidentally double critical Cid in the face before he'd even gotten any chipping done, I'm sure his fans and castmates will forgive him the slip.
The janitors, on the other hand...
Cid Highwind: 15
A young and handsome prince and a young and beautiful princess. A cliche scenario with a cliche ending. Or not. While it is uncertain whether or not Roan has feelings for non-metallic girls, he was at least raised to be chivalrous. Noa, on the other hand, was raised to be a hyperactive martial artist with no idea what it means to be "ladylike" but plenty of know-how when it comes to beating the snot out of things.
So young prince Roan can do nothing but ogle as he gets pounded constantly while under a mind-controlling charm. At least the blonde-haired prince has a cute android nurse to take care of the bruises for him.
Noa meanwhile has no one but is still ^_^
Ordinarily, Sharon and Taro would have a lot in common. Young, eager, tanky, even their skillsets are similar.
Unfortunately for Taro, who was raised by his big brother to always be nice to girls (even if you don't like them), Sharon was raised by many big brothers who she had to beat up daily to prove herself. Well, or maybe not, but her sound, merciless thrashing of Taro until he ran crying from the arena certainly made people wonder...
The power of hyperresonance
Gave Luke quite an advantage in...pre...sence...?
With her meager sword skill
Mist could not hope to kill
Screw it, Luke wins.
Luke fon Fabre: 24
A torn broken note like a heart was found in Chidori's dressing room prior to the match being handed to Vincent by default. Here is the fragment of the message found.
Shot through the heart,
And you're to blame
Darling, you give love
A bad name.
OH! You're a loaded gun ... yeah
OH! There's nowhere to run
No one can save me, the damage is done!
Paint your smile on your lips
Blood red nails on your fingertips.
A school boy's dream, you act so shy
Your very first kiss was your first kiss goodbye.
WHOA! You're a loaded gun
WHOA! There's nowhere to run
No one can save me the damage is done.
Shot through the heart,
And you're to blame
You give love a bad name
I play my part, and you play your game
You give love a bad name.
You give love...
The message is unreadable beyond this.
Chidori Yoshino: 14
Music soothes the savage beast, even if the savage beast happens to be a sword. Or a pseudo-god-dog. Possibly also if it were Bratwurst.
This has been a special week for Sten. Not only did he defeat a divine being, he did so with style! Grace! Panche! He'll be repeating those efforts against Tia, and expecting the best. A grope and Sten should propel himself to victory!
Tia's love of whips is well known. Sten's inept planning is well known.
What isn't well known is that Tia had a pet monkey when she was a child, and she in fact didn't hate Sten. When the monkey appeared, she squealed, ran up to Sten, and hugged him as hard as she could. This doesn't sound like much, but Tia had been channeling the spirit of Elmyera. Three broken ribs, a cracked tail and a shocked crowd later, Tia put down Sten from her tremendously powerful hug. Sure, emergency personel had to be called in to drag Sten off and take him to a clinic for extensive treatment for his internal injuries. Sure, Sten lost the fight. Did he care? No. Someone actually -liked- him! Well, until Sten tried to ask her out on a date and she ran screaming for the nearest Godlikes to slaughter him. Being a beloved monkey only goes so far!