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Fou-Lu vs Kurando Inugami
Tri4ngleM4n Coming soon to rpgdl home video! Remember those fights you'd just like to forget? The ones that were so embarassing for one side that you can't help but laugh for hours at a time!? Well now we've compiled them all, and we're here to give them to you for the low low price of 5000 Gella! You'll get several old favorites such as! Timelord vs. Magic Girl Ghaleon! Starving Grizzly bears vs. Girl scouts! Ryu III vs. Chaos! and of course... Dragon Emporer God vs. Puny Mortal! And if you act now, we'll even throw in the Magic Girl Ghaleon remixed music video! A 200 gella value, YOURS FREE! *Ghaleon was arrested approx. a week after seeing the commerical for being a suspect in a string of WA character murders.* Fou lu > Mortals. Fou-Lu: 67 Lurking Registered User
Purim vs Ryu
Lurking Registered User Sand Dragon: Use it for the multi-hit damage that allows it to OHKO PCs, love it for the Confusion status it tacks on should said PCs somehow survive. Purim: 31 
Terra Branford vs Ultimecia
Pyro When Ultimecia got involved with a woman who ran an orphanage, she ended up possessing her and committing a variety of nefarious deeds. When Terra got involved with an evil manipulator, she ended up being controlled by a slave-crown and committing a variety of nefarious deeds. One would think that Ultimecia would be in her natural element here, having held the leash of more than a few mind-slaves in her time. But wait! Terra went on to grind Kefka into a fine powder after all was said and done. Ultimecia got pasted by the likes of Rinoa after all was said and done. I think we can all agree that Kefka is more competent than Ultimecia, and Terra is *far* more competent than Rinoa. Game. Set. And match. Terra Branford: 73 jaymthegenius@yahoo.com
Lurking Registered User
redmage007
Scias vs Zophar
Lurking Registered User I can't vote on this match, not having played Lunar 2. But I just had to comment on Scias's promising legal career. How is Scias a lawyer? How else can you describe his attempt in the match description to pass off ungodly amounts of damage as Instant Death status? Sorry Scias, while your law degree is forthcoming, you still have a way to go with math: OHKO != ID. OHKO = SPLAT. Scias: 19 Barubary
Teepo vs Alis Landale
Lurking Registered User "Fortunately, though, Alis can handle tough. Add some Laconian Sword, a bit of healing, maybe some luck - and Alis will bring up a world of pain for her opponent this round." That was part of the match description for this match. This is the same Alis who was forced to run through multi-level labyrinths filled with monsters with a horrible leveling bug that prevented her from damaging them half the time? The same Alis who had to fight off Medusa with only a Squirrel-Cat hybrid for backup, all to rescue a legendary resistance leader? The same Alis who, upon rescuing said legendary commander, found that he was in fact worse than the Squirrel-Cat in every way? The same Alis who has just been paired up against an enemy who can outdamage her healing, laugh at ROPE, and probably squish her in two hits if she doesn't heal? Yeah, Alis isn't known much for luck. Teepo: 47 
Izlude Tingel vs Raquel Applegate
Lance Izlude, being a dragoon, has the ability to jump high into the air and crash down on his opponent's head to inflict massive damage. Sometimes a sharp pointy weapon is added to the equation to do even more damage. There is no denying that this ability makes him a total badass, but if there is one thing that Final Fantasy Tactics dragoons can't stand, it's movement. If an opponent moves out of the way before their jump technique is complete, they strike nothing but dead air. Guess what Raquel can do during battle. Go on, guess. The fight between Izlude and Raquel was as predictable as everyone expected. When Izlude leapt into the air for his "Death from Above" move, Raquel did the smartest thing she could think of: She moved out of the way. With his best move thusly ineffective, Izlude had no way to protect himself from the horrific beatdown which followed. Izlude Tingel: 21 
Angela vs Kevin
Pyro Angela is just too sexy for Kevin to handle. He dies of excess nasal bleeding before he can lay a hand on her. Or he just loses by being turned into a Werewolf lawn ornament. Whatever works. Angela: 42 Ralff
Mirage Koas vs Slust
SageAcrin Ahhh, Slust. Charming, intelligent, dashing, powerful, all the things any woman would want. Against a good looking blonde who would sooner rip off his face than chat with him. Nothing personal, just how these things go. Of course, Slust could just simply fight Mirage. But he'd much rather hit on her than hit her. So what's a somewhat perverted, somewhat intelligent, man to do? --- "And you were the first person I thought of." Slust said, leaning back in his chair. "So, what about it?" "You want my help getting a robot to make out with you? Why not just bribe Shion into reprogramming KOS-MOS? She makes a pretty good buisiness that way, though the price is high." Edge said, shrugging. "She's not a robot. She just acts like one in public. I'm sure she's just as warm and reasonable as you'd expect any ditzy blonde to be in private. That whole thing's just a shell." Slust said, grinning. "Yeah, probably." Edge said, nodding. "I think she'd probably gut both of you in ten seconds, have you revived, guts still hanging out, and force you to exercise with Kenji, if she heard you say that." Yuri said. "Besides, it's not even true." "Anyways, any ideas? I tried sending her some flowers, but she made the messenger eat them." Slust said, disappointedly. "You didn't send anyone important, right?" Yuri asked, curiously. "Nah, just Heckran. He's always bumming people for money. I think he's addicted to Drive, it's sad." Slust said, shaking his head and frowning. "Those minor midbosses always get crushed by their sudden rise, and equally sudden fall to a bunch of teenagers. Granted, they're disposable, like guppies, so it's not so bad." "...you think too much. Who knew. Anyways, let me guess, what you really want is us to talk Brey into helping?" Yuri asked. "Or whatever you think would be best. The candy also failed, and you wouldn't want to see what she did to Usar with that necklace. I'm running out of ideas." Slust said glumly. "I don't have the experience with these things you do." "Of course, no one has as much experience with women as I do." Edge said smugly. "And-OW. Damnit, Yuri, why do you always hit me when I say that? Anyway, anything for an intelligent collu-cole-friend." Edge said, smiling. "What is it with you and getting into trouble, anyways, Edge?" Yuri asked, as Slust closed the door behind him. "Is it a gift?" "Like you don't enjoy every minute of it." Edge said happily. "...Bite me." "Okay, the times you aren't getting crushed or beaten up." "...you know, Edge, I think you just explained why I'm still hanging around you. That must be the smartest thing you've ever done." Yuri said in a wondering tone of voice. "Yep, I'm brilliant. Now let's go get Slust some tail!" Edge said, charging out of the room. "And that must be the most stupid...oh, wait, "Ultimate Special Mega Ninja Kick". Or whatever the hell it was. Right. Sorry." Yuri said, following him out of the room. --- "Do you even remember what happened the first time I cast that spell?" Brey said, glaring at Edge. "No. Why?" Edge asked, curiously. "What happened? Did Tifa making out with you give you a heart attack?" "...go find out yourself." Brey said grumpily. "Anyways, I'm not interested in using that spell again." "I thought you used it twice." Yuri said. "Special circumstances!" Brey said angrily. "I said no, and I mean no, you two. I'm not flashing...back to..." Brey shuddered. "...why can't I remember any of this?" Edge said, shaking his head. "Edge, when's Rydia's birthday?" Yuri asked. "...shut up." "Still." Edge said, getting back to the subject at hand. "You have to have something that you are willing to use as help, right? You've never let me down before." "Well, I do have this. It's something Crowley whipped up on a bet by Mazus." Brey said, standing up to rummage through some nearby shelves. "I didn't ask what kind of a bet. I don't think I've ever seen Crowley blush beet red before or since he talked about it. Ah, here we go. The Clichelixer." Brey said, pulling out a bottle of red liquid. "...okay, who the hell named that?" Yuri asked. "Lexis." "I knew it. How the hell did he end up naming it something made by Crowley?" "Well... You see, he's the first person to drink some of this stuff and not get effected. God knows how Crowley talked him into drinking some. Probably gave him some to test. Or let him name it. At any rate... The Clichelixer's effects are to make you act like you look." Brey said, shrugging. "...Huh?" Yuri said. "What the hell does that mean?" "It means that whatever people think you should act like, based on your profession or appearance, you will. Gods start becoming genericly benevolent or pure evil, as the case may be. A knight obtains the IQ of a cantaloupe. Talking animals stop. Many leaders are uneffected, though some experience a loss of voice." Brey said. "This stuff scares the hell out of me. Doesn't even need to be ingested, just pour some on someone. But from the sound of it, it's just the thing. Pretty blonde girl, after all." He added, grinning. "So, let me get this straight. We're going to turn Mirage into a dumb blonde?" Yuri said. "...I'll take fifty bottles." Edge added. "This is the only one. If you can somehow make Crowley make more...but I doubt that. I'm not sure, but I suspect he drank some and ended up in a woman's locker room trying to magic his way into some panties." Brey said. "You can have it, though. I'll be watching and hoping for the best." --- "So, just slash her with this on my sword?" Slust said, glancing down at the blade dubiously. "And she'll turn into a dumb blonde?" "Yep! And then Yuri has the Creamonade blast her!" Edge said happily. "...I what?" Yuri asked. "I didn't tell you to do that?" "No." "Damnit! You forgot, I'm sure of it!" Edge said angrily. "...Edge, what was your mother's maiden name." "Ebl-...Ebl...ette!" "...Oh, never mind." Yuri said, shaking his head, as a gong signified the start of the match. "Well, hello there, lover boy." Mirage said, grinning slightly. "Did you get my replies to your presents?" "...huh. I was right, it was a shell. Under it, you're sarcastic and bitchy." Slust said, puzzled. "The things you learn." "Hmmm, well, it seems like you can do things besides hit on me." Mirage said, nodding. "You aren't even as dull then. Now, let's cut out the chit-chat and get started, okay?" "Very well." Slust said. Suddenly, he leapt forward, hoping to take Mirage by surprise, slashing wildly with the full knowledge that any blow would guarantee his victory. This didn't work out that well. Mirage quickly spun and roundhouse kicked him into a wall. "...he can't...that can't...Oh, come on, we can't have gone to that much effort for nothing." Yuri said, shaking his head. "I'm...not...finished...yet. And...you two...talk...too loud." Slust said, slowly wobbling his way to his feet. "Oh, there's six of you. That's just great." Slust said, shaking his head rapidly. "...I think he's finished anyways." Edge said, sighing. "Well, well, if that's all your stamina is..." Mirage said, smirking. "...you really are a sarcastic bitch. Both of you." Slust said, shaking his head again. "Now..." He said, planting his feet. And slashing wildly again. "..." Edge and Yuri both stared blankly. "...He isn't that stupid, is he?" Edge asked. "Well, he did just have a head injury..." Yuri replied, shaking his head and sighing. Mirage easily sidestepped the blows... ...and Slust, now wobbling remarkably little, tripped her into the dirt, then attempted to slash her down the back. This had a mixed effect. Mirage, sensing the vunerability of her position, quickly rolled, grasped the blade with her gauntlets, and shoved it back towards Slust. The blade flew free, slashing Slust on the cheek. "Oh, great. We do all that work and he gets too cocky and now he's a...say, what does hap-oh, god, he's a Dragoon." Yuri said, staring. "Brey! Get over here and tell me how you fix this, now!" "Oh, damn." Mirage said, glancing at her arms. "He cut me a bit. Oh...well..." She said, giggling a little, as she pulled out a mirror and fixed her somewhat disheveled hair. "Fix? Crowley said it just wore off." Brey said, walking over to Yuri's seat. "After how long?" Yuri insisted. "About a day, just based on a little amount contacting you. Longer, if you eat some or get a lot on you." "Hmph. First Cecil takes my first love away from me, then Zeromus mind controls me, and now I can't even get a date!" Slust said, sighing. "This has to be that stupid paladin's fault." "Oh, you sweet boy." Mirage said, giggling. "You sent me all those presents and I didn't thank you at all! What was I thinking?" Mirage said, hugging Slust hard enough to crack several ribs through his armor. "Bah. But you're not the one I love. My love, Rosa, found another! Though, you are pretty cute. Have I mentioned that I'm a hot Dragoon?" Slust said, smiling at Mirage despite the pain. "Also, I have my own airship. Want to take a spin?" "...uh...say, Kain's...not really that much like that." Edge said, staring blankly. "No, but it's a composite thing, based on how he thinks of Kain and cliche Dragoons." Brey said. "Personally, I think it's an improvement. On Kain, not on Slust." "*Giggle.* Oh, you. Sure, I'll go wherever you want." Mirage said, winking. "I forfiet to you, lover-buns, I could never hurt such a cute guy." "I think this is a case of all's well that ends well, isn't it?" Edge said hopefully. "...that depends. Where is the rest of the Clichelixer?" Yuri asked. Edge frowned. "I guess Slust still has it on him. Why?" "Has it occured to you that Slust hits on more than a few women?" "Of course he does, he's awesome." Edge said, nodding. "And this is a public place." Yuri added. "So?" Brey's eyes widened, as the penny dropped. "...maybe...maybe they'll...just...I mean...oh no, women tend to be spellcasters, they won't just impale him..." "What? What's the problem? I don't get it." Edge said, looking back and forth between Yuri and Brey. "You bastard! How could you toy with my feelings like that!" "You pervert!" "Dog! I let you into my heart and you did this to me!?" "Kurse you, you vikious fiend!" "I'm going to kick your arse to the moons!" Angered shrieks and cries could be heard from around the arena, as various women who Slust had convinced were his only love watched him cuddle with Mirage. "...think about this. What do mages use?" Brey said. "Magic." Edge answered, happy to have something he was at least remotely sure on asked of him. "What magic?" "Uh...Fire. Lightning. Healing?" "So, fire and lightning hit a bottle of liquid. What happens?" "...It...Oh, we run like hell. That's the answer, right?" Edge said. "Yes." "Yeah." "Okay. NINJA ESCA-" Edge yelled. Just in time to get caught in the drifting cloud of vapor and greasy smoke from a charred Mirage and Slust. "-..." Edge said, staring blankly. "...Oh, great, I got some of that on-...wait, I don't feel any different." Yuri said. "Huh. Now that's weirder than hell." Yuri said, looking around. "Heh. Hi there, cutie." Kurando said, from a few dozen seats over, to Aeris. "This seat next to you wouldn't happen to be taken, would it? That damned Edge is just sort of staring blankly at things, and I don't like being associated with him like that. And this seat looks pretty." "Oh, that's fine. Just as long as you don't touch me or try to melt my heart or anything like that." Aeris said, nodding calmly. "After all, I am an Ancient, we aren't supposed to have human emotions. We're supposed to sacrifice to the greater good." "...Oh, I get it. I'm my own cliche. That's...I'm not sure if it's awesome or sad." Yuri said, shrugging. "Oh well, I haven't been sure about myself in that way for ages." "Hehee, come here, you little vixen." "Eeek! Get away from me, you dirty old man!" Aeris shrieked, as Brey chased her. "...say, I wonder how long this stuff lasts if you inhale it." Yuri said, frowning, as the entire crowd began shifting into cliches. "About six days." A mask-wearing Crowley said as he walked up to Yuri. "And this is why I should remember to never trust Brey with anything, I take it?" "Yep, pretty much." "Yuuuuurriiiii~!" A gaggling of giggling women rushed up to Yuri, squealing and hugging him. "I'm your biggest fan!" "No, I am!" "No, me!" "Uh, what the hell?" Yuri said. "Oh, that must be a cliche now. You being the man every girl secretly wants." Crowley said. "...wow. This whole thing worked out great." Yuri said, grinning. "Six days of random women thinking it's cliche to want me and wanting me. Still can't decide if this is sad or awesome, though. But I'm going to enjoy every minute of it." "..." Edge said, still staring blankly. "Well, everything's great except for him. I think he's broken." Yuri said, waving a hand in front of Edge's unblinking eyes. "EDGE!" A much smaller group of girls rushed up to Edge. "...Okay, I know he's broken. What's..." Edge, approached by rushing figures, suddenly sprang to life. In a torrent of blood, his blade cut his way through the squealing women before any could hope to move, his movements a dance of death, beautiful, yet horrific, to watch. "...cliche ninja. Of course." Yuri said, shaking his head. "He's going to have years of therapy to get over killing fangirls. Also, I think Edge has, yet again, unleashed something that will indirectly kill thousands. There has to be at least a few more people who turning cliche is a bad id-" "Ahahahahahaha! SUFFER, YOU PUNY MORTALS, AND PERISH BEFORE THE WRATH OF GHALEON!" "-ea. Yeah, like him." Yuri finished. "Overall, a pretty good day's work. Let's go get a drink, Crowley." Yuri said, with one arm around Millenia, another around Rina, and a giggling Elly and Lenneth Valkyrie trying to cuddle as close as possible to him. --- Ultimately, the results were fairly predictable. Several hundred generic knights and drooling warriors wandered the Duelling League, with generic signifigant others, occasionally banding together to fight the great evils, such as Ghaleon, Fou-Lu, Magus, Vincent, Chu-Chu, Umaro, and the like. Frankly, they just attacked whatever amused onlookers told them to. Several hundred mages either dove into spellbooks or women's locker rooms, as the case may be. The death toll of said mages rose to 437. Despite there only being 274 mages in the audience. Evidently, birds of a feather flock together, and some cliches aren't entirely undeserved. The rest of the crowd handled their issues in various ways. Ranging from those, such as Augustine or Ness, who felt no real effects(Though, Ness was actually heard to say a few words at points. The fact that these words were directly related to questions that required a choice of him beyond yes or no, which he always could answer, may be related.) To those of Tifa(Who found herself, six days later, wearing a french maid's outfit and sitting on Crono's lap. Fortunately, this happened to be shortly after her match.). Or Celes(Who, by day four, had had her frigid and loveless heart melted by no less than seven people. Actually, this may not be that different.) And Pikachu(Several thousand Pichu have now infested the Duelling League. In the six days alotted, two-of opposite species chewed out of their rooms-despite the doors being open-and procceeded to become the #1 Duelling League pest for six days. Now there are 4278 bewildered Pichus roaming about wondering why they were eating grain.). And finally, there were the rare unfortunate few whose cliche beings were enhanced by the magical drug. The Profound Darkness, for six days, literally did nothing but the most random evil possible; It became a 31337 speaking AOL-loving Vincent fangirl who wore tight-fitting bikinis and forced Fresca and ancient fruitcakes upon all it met. Rolf quite literally turned into a piece of cardboard. Chu-Chu was declared a natural disaster, slapped into a barrel marked with multiple biohazard symbols, and dumped into an ocean. (Some people said this was overdue.) Edge, himself, found himself jumping off walls, killing evil birds and hordes of generic ninja, when he finally came to. Fortunately, the entire incident, due to the start of it presumably, is entirely blanked from his mind. Though, he does tend to decapitate nearby people, then pass out, when young girls scream his name. Don't worry, he'll get over that fast. Brey woke to find himself in bed with Nina the Second. He promptly had fourteen consecutive heart attacks. (Nina nursed him back to health. Evidently, some feelings are not easily put aside. Or possibly she just wanted to make sure he didn't spread the tale about.) And Yuri will eternally remember these days as the happiest of his life. Sadly, most of his fangirls melted away after the serum wore off. However, he still has Rose and Deis' numbers. Oh, and Slust? Well, as the judges recalled-after leveling several townships, they happened to be Godlikes-Mirage had forfieted. While interference had technically been used, it was best to try to forget anything had ever happened. And now Slust and Mirage are dating. Blackmail? No, Mirage just enjoyed being brainless over a man a frighteningly large amount. Slust's not sure if he should laugh or cry. On the one hand, he has a cute blonde. On the other, she'll rip him in half if he looks at anyone else... Mirage Koas: 23
Harle vs Sain
SageAcrin Sometimes, even hitting on women has it's limits. As Sain found out. He came up with his best lines, planned out everything carefully... ...And Harle promptly laughed and offered to go out with him. Sain was so stunned that he never saw the Lunairetic coming. On the upside, he died with a smile on his face. Harle: 54 Xan the shadow
Tifa Lockheart vs Florina
SageAcrin Two beautiful women. Judged by an all-male team of six judges. So many ways this could go wrong, aren't there? With the mudpits, the cream, the bikini contests, the wet tee-shirts, why, there were an incredible array of options at their disposal. --- "...Uh, why aren't...we down there?" Florina asked, puzzled. "Well, you see, the judges couldn't make up their minds-ow, don't give up that easy, Sten!...never thought I'd live to say that..." Tifa said, sighing. "Anyway, they decided to fight it out, since they couldn't make up their minds in just what way to humiliate and scantily clad both of us. And each one's wearing a certain color. Yours is blue, mine is red. Whoever's color wins the brawl, well, we win." "What? But...I don't get it, if we win, they...can't do that." Florina said. "Well, no one ever called them bright." She said, watching Zidane finish off Zell. "And it looks like my side's the winner. Now, I need to run as far as possible before they think I should be grateful." Tifa said. "Maybe I can hide in another arena. I think Slust and Mirage are fighting." She added, as she dashed out of the audience. Tifa Lockheart: 63 
Squall Leonheart vs Margarete Zelle
SageAcrin Squall's recent depression had fed upon it's self. First, he gets called a failure for all to see. Then, they call in someone who can shoot him firing-squad style. Unless he got lucky, one shot to the head, and he was dead. Not exactly great for self-esteem. In fact, he was angry. Why should his life be like this? Why should people call him, the leader of SeeD, one of the strongest mercenaries ever, a failure? Just because he had done some things for love? Horrible! He didn't deserve that! He didn't deserve to be shot to death! And so, as he entered the arena, a single word rang out. "Megid." Squall said. Moments later, an interesting ash pattern on the arena floor marked the spot where Margarete had stood. "Ahhhh, I feel much better. All that anger's horrible." Squall said, working his shoulders, as a stunned crowd stared blankly at him. "Maybe this will teach people to call me a failure." He said, walking calmly out of the arena. "...is that legal?" Rand said, staring after Squall. "I don't know." Robo answered. "Do you feel like angering him, though?" "Oh, that. He just Drew it from Chaz." Rika said, shrugging. "Chaz beat him up over it and called him a loser that would never be able to use the spell. Guess I get to tell him he was wrong." She said, giggling. "...he still might have another shot, though. I guess it's legal." Rand said, shrugging. Squall Leonheart: 45 jaymthegenius@yahoo.com
Mara vs Yulie Ahtreide
SageAcrin Poor Mara. The first time in ages she gets in, and the exact same thing happens to her that happened last time. Win one match, and draw someone she can't handle. Well, one thing always made Mara feel better. And at least her opponent this time could appreciate it. "Um, uh...are you sure about this?" Yulie said, from inside the dressing room. "Well, I threw the match for you, didn't I?" "Yeah, but...um, this?" Yulie said, as she exitted the room in a copy of Mara's outfit. "Sure, you look great!" Mara said, laughing. "Now, try these on." She added, handing Yulie a dozen more outfits. "We'll get you out of that drab, plain outfit and into some really cute stuff!" Mara loves to shop. "Jude, please save me." Yulie said, sighing. "Then again, maybe not. I don't want him to see me like this..." Mara: 8
Viki vs Kelvena
SageAcrin Viki is random. Perhaps this is the most obvious statement in the history of the world. Perhaps not. Surely, someone has pointed at the sun at some point and remarked that it is hot. Regardless, it doesn't make it less true. However, Kelvena was a seasoned warrior, a graduate of Jugend and one of the Elements. A little random luck wasn't going to stop her. However, a lot managed it. As Viki prepared to cast Set! upon her opponent, she sneezed. And so, Vendetta, Ramsus' Omnigear, promptly appeared. And landed on Kelvena. On the upside, Ramsus was actually in the Gear. He felt so bad about not successfully checking the fall, that he's now visiting Kelvena, who he basically didn't give the time of day before, in the hospital. Every day. Kelvena, normally calm and somewhat emotionless, was heard to be thanking god for getting squished lately. I guess a spurned fangirl getting her fondest wishes has that effect. Viki: 42 Apalachian
Reed vs Lezard Valeth
SageAcrin Reed is a brave fighter. ...Wait, he's not, is he? Well, at least he's not that easy to push around, right? No? How about intelligent? Or powerful enough to overcome, or possibly overcompensate for, these flaws? He's not? Hmmm. Is he charming and debonair? Does he have good connections? Nope. Is his opponent someone that is known to be able to literally survive the end of the world, who is charming in a vaguely creepy way, with good connections in a weird way, intelligent, hard to push around, not a wuss, and...is...well, at least capable of hurting Reed pretty badly in a fight? Yep. Lilly was seen before the match, trying vainly to drag a self-sedated Reed out of bed, with little luck. Welll, at least he knows one thing well. His mistress. (No, not like that.) He knocked himself out rather than have to deal with an angry Lilly. Lezard simply smiled. Getting to Godlike the hard way wasn't something he expected to work, with all those fools biased against him, but things seemed to be looking up. Reed: 27 
Relm Arrowny vs Pikachu
Cinny Yeah, it's pretty unfortunate that Pikachu has fallen into the hands of someone who is Final Fantasy VI's MASTER OF CONTROLLING BEASTS. Sucks to be you, Pikachu. Relm Arrowny: 70 Lurking Registered User
Chelsea Torn vs Cray
Lurking Registered User Thunk thunk thunk! This is the sound of arrows embedding themselves in Cray's weapon, a giant club more than wide enough to double as a shield for the slow Woren. SPLAT! This is either the sound of Cray's club serving it's original purpose, or a giant column of earth slamming from nowhere onto a frail archer girl. Chelsea Torn: 23
The Female Scientist Brigade - Episode 2! Draco Ignifer The Wondershot. A weapon of terrifying potential. Formed with the fully charged power of the Sunstone, it is the strongest pistol known to man. Unfortunately, it takes second place after the Angel Slayer for most random weapon known to man. There's a massive treatise on exactly why this happens, involving factors such as the interaction of radiation and thamaturgy on the electron structure of the power core... but suffice to say, the number of variables involved dwarfs the combined sum of Edge's luck score and the absolute vale of Zidane's luck score. Which means that, while potentially it could reduce the competition to a smouldering ashheap, it could also give them a light sunburn. Enter the skills of the other scientists. Specifically, in this case, the skills of Miss Shion Uzuki, and her invention, the anti-Gnosis weapon known as KOS-MOS. More specifically, the ability to collapse near-dimensional states together into a single dimension, and thereby force the Gnosis, who exist in a dimension slightly out of phase with our own, into ours. Theoretically, whenever we make a choice, we create a number of universes slightly out of phase with our own, in which we made the other choice. Wondershot, although not consciously making a choice, still randomly generates a projectile's power, and still creates countless universes where a different projectile was chosen, all slightly out of phase. Naturally, the scientists saw the application which this had. By scanning the universes, isolating the one in which Wondershot fires at maximum potential, and then collapsing all universes around it, effectively eliminating the random choice, they make Wondershot become utterly unstoppable. The only problem was getting a quantum computer, a dimensional collapser, and a sunstone-powered pistol to all fit together. By the day of the tournament, though, they had finished their invention. Computer and modified KOS-MOS system fit together in a backpack, only slowing down Lucca a tiny bit, and aside from some connecting wires and cables, her pistol was as lightweight as ever. It looked like everything had gone perfectly. And as Lucca entered the arena, her fellow scientists and android admirers cheering her on, she smiled confidently, ready to prove once and for all the power of the female scientist brigade. She did it, alright. In retrospect, they should have spent a little bit of time in the prototyping phase. True, they were working down to the wire on getting the system compact enough for combat, but the last iteration had been rifle-sized, and they really could have stopped to test it first. Because, as Lucca found out with her first shot, the dimensional collapser system didn't quite do what it was supposed to. The computer worked just fine... it found all possible dimensions, and sent a signal to the one where Wondershot was strongest, forcing all the out of phase dimensions to that phase. Unfortunately, they hadn't fully realized the implications. The Gnosis weren't pulled into this dimension... theirs and hers fused. And this system did the exact same thing to every single dimension formed by the firing of Wondershot. Every single possible probability, every single reason that might cause a shot to veer a bit off or hit a bit weakly, was fused into a single dimension with every pull of the new, improved Wondershot's trigger. When the smoke cleared, Lucca was unconscious, thrown against the back wall of the arena. Everyone on her half of the stadium was clearing their eyes, trying to see after the blinding flash of light caused by an infinity of Wondershot bolts exploding at once. Her opponent was gone. Her opponent's half of the stadium was gone. About 1% of the entire planet the match was being held on was gone. And a few seconds later, everyone else on the roster was gone, in a sudden flurry of doctors' appointments, dead grandmothers, and stomachaches. Victory: 38 Defeated in finals: 9 Defeated easily: 29 Lurking Registered User
legendaryflyingfailure
Alanna82
Starphoenix das Helpoemer
Shihali
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