Season 13, Week 2
Seymour
(Final Fantasy X)
 
The renowned Maester, summoner, and all-around psychopath faces an opponent as unlike him as as a Godlike could get this week. The woman known only by a misnomer, False Althena spent her entire existence attempting to cling to her pitiful life for an eternity, making her exactly the sort of trash the both dead and death-bringing Seymour despises above all else. Even if his famed defenses and powerful quadracast proves inadequate in this magical duel, Seymour can always shift his elemental resistance to Lightning - nulling his foe's only notable offense before snuffing her meaningless existence.

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Sure, False Althena likes all the power that Zophar gave her, but she downright loves is how eternally sexy he made her. And thus her main concern going into this match is not that she might lose, but that Seymour is capable of manipulating his own unsent body to make himself sexier than even she! That's not quite a rational fear, though - after all, no matter how many times he shifts his form, she is still the creation of the dark god Zophar--instant perfection to which a lowly summoner couldn't possibly hope to compare regardless of how many times he tries...or could he?


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Fight? Seymour will ask False Althena to mary him, and Zophar, eager to push his own political agenda, won't likely refuse. And as they walk out of the arena hand in hand, Seymour will carefully make sure False Althena crosses that white line first.

Seymour: 39
False Althena: 12