Season 59, Week 2
Freya
(Valkyrie Profile Series)
 
Surely, this must be a joke! The Goddess of Fertility (and Unofficial Goddess of Making Things Explode with Massive Ether Strikes) is a bit distraught over having been insulted with a downgrade to this pathetic division, but with competition like this, she should have no problem showing those who doubt her just what she's capable of. A flick of her wrist and Jeff will explode in the aether at the behest of the mighty Freya's Ether Strike. Bottle rockets will avail the foolish mortal not, as they bounce off the Goddess's massive... defensive works... in an ineffective manner. Don't challenge a god when you're just a horny little boy.

V

S

A nerd in puberty going up against a goddess of sex and fertility. Wowzers. While normally such a goddes would simply charm the young man into submission, Freya apparently has no such talents. Which is quite unfortunate for her, as she also happens to be rather frail and Jeff's Multi Bottle Rockets hurt a LOT (to put it qualitatively). While Ether Strike would probably end Jeff if Freya could use it, the fact that she is eating one of Jeff's improvised incendiary nightmares will make sure she dies quite painfully first. It is really a waste of such a beauty, but science comes before pleasure for Earthbound's resident super-nerd.


Taishyr
A nerd. A goddess of fertility with the bounty to match.

There was only one way this could end.

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"ETHER STRIKE ETHER STRIKE GODDAMN YOU, YOU, YOOOOOU CHIIIIIIIIIIIIILD HOW DARE YOU POST PICTURES OF ME TO -THAT- WEBSITEEEEEE!"

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Asgard's best computer hackers and wizards are attempting to remove all traces of Jeff's... illegally taken pictures from the internet.

This consists of Gandar, Mystina, and Badrach. As such, it may take a bit.

Meanwhile, Jeff has been made an honorary member of the Pervert Squad and inexplicably shunned by his best friend, Tony.

Freya: 28
Jeff: 3