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The Wild Rose: Isn't it ROMANTIC!? "Yo, Seifer, why are we here again? I mean, there's nothing but kids here, ya know?" "Cause I'm pissed, that's why! Finally got a break from that damn job, and I need to blow some steam on something, so why not take candy from some kids?" "Yeah, but Fujin's not here, ya know? I mean, wouldn't it have made more sense to wait for her to finish the season, ya know?", Raijin responded. "Shut up! Besides, if I stick around too much longer, that Norgard Defense Force might actually recruit me, and they don't take no for an answer!" (WORD OF GOD'S NOTE: Actually, they do. Problem is that the consequences involve Vaynard declaring war on you right afterwards. Nevermind that being forced to oppose the NDF is not exactly a threat, but that's neither here nor there, it's still annoying.) "Besides... hey, there's a kid, let's go pick on him!", Seifer yelled, fixing his skull cap with a defiant smile. (ANOTHER NOTE FROM THE WORD OF GOD: yes, he's wearing that outfit, and no one is gonna question this either. Go figure) "Raijin, you're first!" It is perhaps best we do not explore in depth the next scene. Raijin in a deadly verbal duel with a 6 year old NPC is perhaps the dumbest thing lately outside of conversations involving "I like swords", not to mention it'd be embarassing for the kid to even be shown having to deal with the big ape. Skipping to the dramatic finale... "Damn it kid! Give me your lunch money, or, something! Ya know!" "I don't have any! I told you this! If you keep bothering me, I'll tell mama on you!" "Ha!", Seifer interjected. "Kid, I know who your 'mama' is, and she's not gonna be here for a while!" "...really?", said Raijin "Yeah, same reasons as Fuijin, busy fighting last week. Why do you think of all the orphanages, I chose THIS dump?" "I thought it was the location, ya know." Given the lack of Fuijin to kick Raijin in the shins, Seifer decided to take the abuse into his hands for once. Donning a blue foam bat out of thin air, the blonde ruffian smacked Raijin over the head, knocking him down. Seifer then turned to the child - "Let that be undeniable proof of how much I can own you, kid!" Seifer started laughing... only to be interrupted by a shining arrow brushing his face (which happened to hit Raijin as he was standing up, pinning him into a nearby tree). "You who would pick on poor defenseless children, you have no justice! No dreams of beauty!" said a shadowy figure standing on the rooftop. "For you shall know that so long as there are dreams, I will always stand tall!" The shadows pasted revealing a fabulous white-haired man dressed in blue armor, a bandana, and what looked like 6 different weapons. "For I am Firion, the Wild Rose of Fynn!" "Dreams? Beauty! HA! Isn't THAT ROMANTIC! I have my own beautiful dreams and you won't stop them!", Seifer responded as Firion jumped off the roof. "You'll see, I'm as much a master at fishing as I'm a master of rap music! And what the hell are you doing here anyway? I don't remember hearing about any 'Wild Rose' in this place!" "Oh, see, I'm a good friend of Cloud's, who happens to be a good friend of the girl who runs this place, so..." "...god damn crossovers. BAH! I'll totally own you in this next fight!", Seifer yelled angrily, fixing his skull cap, throwing away his struggle bat and actually pulling out his Gunblade. "For I am the Sorceress' Knight! You can't beat me!" And so, an epic duel of ROMANTIC DREAMS shall transpire! Who will win between the symbolic WILD ROSE and... uh... THE SKULL CAP OF LOUDMOUTHNESS!? |
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DragonKnight Zero Seifer wins the battle but he still loses the war. Mystere shows up proclaiming to him, "You need a spanking!" He proceeds to deliver just that to Seifer both figuratively and literally. With all the kids watching, and pointing, and laughing. The Wild Rose: 21 Seifer: 30 Toteone
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