Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: RPGDL-Style!
VS
~OK

"SSSQQQUUUAAALLLLL!!!!" Rinoa screamed, throwing a plate past her husband's head. Only a few years after an official marriage, and Squall had turned into a typical sloth of a husband, which probably is to be expected, I guess. Currently, he was sitting down on the couch, staring at the TV and watching old Westerns while drinking out of a gallon jug of milk.

Seeing no movement from her husband, she picked up the nearby phone. She ran into the kitchen, and dialed a number she had thought about dialing earlier, but never had: 1-800-FLA-MERS.

"Hello?" she spoke into the phone. "Yes, I'd like to schedule my husband for a visit from the Flamer Crew. The reason? He's turned into a lazy piece of crap. Whenever I ask him to work his gunblade magic on me, he just says 'whatever' and goes back to the TV. The guy's got no fashion sense either...all he wears if that ugly leather coat all the time, even in bed! His hair is a mess. He drinks milk straight from the jug. And the last time he did something was to paint the house a week ago, and he painted it black! Do you know how hot it gets in here? I want him to be a good husband! I deserve it! I really do...I'll do anything...really? You'll come? Tomorrow?! Yes! Thank you!"

Hanging up the phone, she grinned, and went through the rest of the day normally. The next morning, she woke up at 6:00 am, and waited by the door. Thirty minutes later, she was greeted by the five people who could save her husband...

Jun Kashihara, specializing in grooming; Rassius Luine, specializing in culture; Vincent de'Boule, specializing in Fashion; Simone Verducci, specializing in Food & Wine; and Milich Oppenheimer, specializing in Interior Design.

The goal of these mighty five is to re-make Squall into a suitable human being, if that's possible. They have all day to change him, but Squall's a stubborn character. Can they do it?
  • The Flamer Crew turns Squall into a Thuper Guy!
  • Squall stays a lazy, worthless, piece of crap

Cmdr_King
On the one hand, history has shown that, under sufficent pressure, Squall can be worn down and turned perfectly malleable.
On the other, the writeup shows that Squall has become immune to Rinoa's pestering.
Let that sink in. Immune to the pestering of Rinoa.
I dunno about you, but I can't envision a world in which 5 queers (even ones as flaming as this crew) can match Rinoa in pestering power.
Ironically, I predict that the Flamers will succeed in one respect though- they'll eventually piss Squall off enough that he'll fetch the old master Junction from the closet, and give the queer crew the sort of thrashing that only a Triple-to-speed auto-haste Ultima-to-strength Squall can deliver, snapping him out of his funk.
Of course, that may not be for the best...

The Flamer Crew turns Squall into a Thuper Guy!: 14
Squall stays a lazy, worthless, piece of crap: 18

Grefter
Not only does the Flamer Crew turn Squall into "thuper guy", he goes home with them. I guess a few years of Rinoa is enough to convince anyone to give up on women. On a similar note it only took a week for Rinoa to make her lesbian relationship with Selphie known public.

AAA
Squall is indeed a very stubborn person.

However, a corpse shows little argument.

So, a few hours after the Fab Five beat him up, he finds himself clean, well-dressed, and his house full of fantastical new wallpaper.

And after hearing a promise that they would be back if he didn't shape up and start being a good husband, his attitude improved immensly.

Poor Squall. Maybe he'll get lucky and his significant other will fall off a cliff.

Hunter Sopko
Hold on... Squall needs influence to become a Thuper Guy? Within 5 minutes he'll become one of the Flamers themselves.