Season 36, Week 1
Profound Darkness
(Phantasy Star 4)
 
Profound Darkness. Truly, the name radiates an aura of pure evil. It's like she has a simple satisfaction with being the queen of darkness, without remorse for her negative effects on the world. So what’s a girl to do? Well, after destroying the dreams of four duelers in the Godlike field, she reigns as champion. And her next test on her way to a double championship? False Althena and her Ray are the next challengers to the throne, but Profound Darkness will not allow it! Megid may be too holy of a spell for pure evil to use, but pure evil can also make their own rules if they are a goddess like her, and thus the Megid spam begins. No deity, let alone a false one, could stand up to that horrific carnage, and that is why PD will stay the Godlike champion.

V

S

Although a goddess versus a false goddess may seem like a gross mismatch at first glance, things are not always what they seem, especially dealing with a legitimately powerful force such as False Althena. Hell, all Profound Darkness does is wreck havoc once every thousand years with the easily beatable Dark Force, while False Althena actually does things. And Profound Darkness may have her Megid, but no holy spell could bring down a pure maiden like False Althena. And she has sweet sweet electricity on her side with the power of Ray, and not even supposedly-immortal evil beings like all that too much, especially with the amount of force False Althena can put behind it. This champ had better move over, because a new goddess is in town.


SageAcrin
A young woman, desiring to become one of the most powerful beings in the universe, through giving her life, her soul, to a great, demonic force.

A great, demonic force.

The conclusion?

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"...okay... Why, exactly, are they making out?" Terra said, slightly disgusted, as the least monstrous forms of the Profound Darkness and False Althena went at it on the arena floor.

"This is why you need to not get up for a drink, when you're a judge." Yuna observed. "Anyways, from what I caught earlier, False Althena pledged her alligience to the Profound Darkness, which absolutely everyone saw coming. So I guess she's already lost. Probably. She won't call the match yet, though."

"And then?" Terra asked.

"And then they said something about there being no perverts at all in the arena, and no male judges... and started going at it." Chris Lightfellow said.

"As statistically unlikely as it is." Jessica Albert added.

"...well, the Profound Darkness is one of the greatest sources of evil, so somehow I'm not surprised." Terra said in disgust. "Why isn't this bothering you five, anyways?"

"Well, you sort of get used to this sort of thing, hanging around Rikku and Paine...er, not...quite this sort, but..." Yuna stammered.

"...same thing, replace Rikku and Paine with Alma Kinnan." Chris replied, blushing.

"...um...I guess hitting on monsters gives me...er..." Jessica stammered.

"...same thing, replace monsters with snake." Royce said. "Now shut up."

Terra turned to Fujin, who still hadn't answered.

"...BETTER THAN RAIJIN." Fujin simply noted.

"...well, at least one of you has a good reason." Terra sighed.

Profound Darkness: 40
False Althena: 31

T.G. Nevareh
False Althena. Like, you know, the pretty girl who sold her soul to Zophar, who looks female and has the deepest voice ever, to stay pretty forever? Then, to protect how pretty she was, she became a scorpion-woman-chimera, thus negating all of her prettiness?

False Althena is a deft manipulator, but unlike her own claims, SHE doesn't do anything. ZOPHAR is the one who does everything. ZOPHAR seals the dragons, ZOPHAR directs Pentagulia to be constructed over the Fortress of Althena, ZOPHAR revives Ghaleon and directs Ghaleon's actions, ZOPHAR eventually becomes a giant cuttlefish that EATS the same Fortress of Althena, and False Althena doesn't do anything but be very, very pretty. Unless Zophar is going to sit in the stands and send bolts of juice to her, why is False Althena even here?

Utter pointlessness aside...

False Althena has durability and an attack that is almost guaranteed to kill any PC it hits, so she's good for a slugfest. Neither side can claim complete excellence over the other in any area, and thus that's what this would be: a slugfest. False Althena also comes from a game where being a PC-killer means hitting them very very hard so they can't survive a single hit. She has arguably the strongest attack in her game, with which she has to make due compared to some later bosses who merely attack half a dozen times.

Still, she doesn't have Total Amazing Immunity to anything, so it's pure strength on strength. And at least the Profound Darkness succeeds where False Althena, whose pure unadultered vanity is her only driving motivation after all this time, ironically ultimately fails: looking good while kicking butt.