Signors, welcome to the RPG Dueling League, an online community dedicated to pitting the fiercest, most PASSIONATE competitors from the RPG world against each other in a battle of fighting skill, and then democratically deciding who wins. I am your humble host, Morrie, and it is my pleasure to introduce you to the Arena, or as I like to call it, THE MONSTROUS PIT!!! The RPGDL is a site where anyone can vote on a series of matches between a host of different RPG characters every week. Each Season, match-ups are organized by random selection among the 4 different divisions: “Light”, “Middle”, “Heavy”, and “Godlike”. The winners of the initial match-ups are decided by which contestant receives the most votes, and then continue on to fight the other winners in a tournament setup until the end of a season, ending up with 4 champions, one from each division. The sixth week of a season features a team match where the Godlike champion and other three runner-ups face off against the Godlike runner-up and other three champions; as well as a chance for re-rankings among the divisions. Not that difficult, ay? So welcome to the RPGDL, signors, we hope you enjoy your stay! For a more in-depth summation of the features of the site, head over to the FAQ. For more information on the Rules, Chat, exciting additional tournaments, or stat topics, which detail information about all your favorite duelers, visit or join the Forum. I hope to see you around again. The Monstrous Pit needs voters like YOU always, signors. Ho hum. Another day, another paycheck. Another day, another, much much larger, paycheck. You give yourself paychecks? No, but I steal Odin's. Wha? Wait, why is Moppy making more than me? In addition to his janitorial duties, he's also the Manager of Personnel. So... he manages... us? ... Paycheck? No, but apparently those government bleeding hearts required me to have somebody in that position. So I just picked Odin's name out of my helmet and gave him a raise, which I then took back. Your corporate manuevering knows no bounds. No kidding. ... Raise? That's right Odin, now run along like a good little Aesir. Alright, team, let's get going, I don't have all day to talk about how unbelievably, unimaginably rich I am. And with that little bit of humility, welcome to Behind the Scenes, dear readers! It's Finals Week, you know what that means! Briefer interviews! Less beatings! The fact that the only female contestant besides a giant monster is some pasty-faced cleric mooning over a paladin prettyboy! MORE beatings OW OW OW OW! All that and more (oh quit complaining, Odin, it's just a detached retina) await! Let's start off with our Godlike finalists, Yuri and the Profound Darkness. Oh, look, I get to beat another evil monster. What a completely unexpected occurance. Bitter, human? Bitter because you shall soon taste defeat? Why are the female ones always so chatty? I mean, it's not like they have much of a personality anyway, but at least the guy demons got to the point. "I WILL DESTROY THE WORLD WITH MY DARK POWERS" and whatnot. One quick combo and then you can take it easy until the next one pops up. How DARE you ignore me? That's it! I shall have no other recourse than to unleash my master plan of Darkness! The first step is to send you a strongly worded letter! The next is to follow that up with a phone call, feigning politeness... which you'll fall for, fool that you are! Next, I'll... Uh-huh. Ignoring you now. Yuri, you seem pretty confident. Any real reason why? Hey, it's Seraphic Radience. Can't argue with that! Fair enough. Heavy, gentlemen? C'mon you two, just step past the ranting demon... Step 13: But then, the kitty will no longer love you! MWAHAHAHAAHAH! Step 14... Eeeeeevil. And here we are again. ... So, Rosa? What can you do against the silent main/Dragon boy over there? Well, healing. And Holy. And I suppose an arrow in the eye. Isn't that what you're supposed to do with Dragons? Ryu, your rebuttal? ... I understand that, but.. ... But you can't possible think that I.. ... It was White Mage college, it was a different time, a time for experimentation... ... DON'T BRING MY MOTHER INTO THIS! I'M OUT OF HERE! Oh no he didn't! Oh yes he did! Did what? We don't know. But whatever it was, he certaintly did not do it. I disagree, and wish to express this in the quickest and zaniest way linguistically possible. Ooookay. Middles? Nice to be here. Not bad for a new guy, eh? Keep fishing for compliments and I'll throw you to Kuja's Teatime Squad. ...You wouldn't dare. Try me. Nanaki, thoughts on this week's match? I'll admit that it might be hard to hit him, but I'm sure I can manage to get into Limit range and from there it should be cake. And Arnaud? I'd like to see you try, my furry little haircomb wearer. Raquel better make room for my trophy. Step 67: The surprise spaghetti trap will have forced you to lose the pivotal game of Parcheesi! Step 68: Once the army of Rabites is in place, I will unleash hell upon the uncharted wasteland near your house, forcing you to ponder what I'm up to! Step 69:... If only we could shut her up somehow... Lemme handle it. Oh, Darkness? Yes? Fatty! I... I... IT'S EVIL HIGH SCHOOL ALL OVER AGAIN! CHAOS WHY WON'T YOU LOOOOOVE MEEEEEEEEEE! Morte: Abusing the mental trauma of teenage years for good causes. Well, that's better. Okay, let's get the Lights and get out of here. I hope this doesn't take long, my wife and I were supposed to go out for the weekend. Yes, that's right. A bard in the Light Finals. No, you aren't hallucinating. Yang, how are you going to paste Karyl? Kick, punch, it's all in the mind, and then I sneeze and when I open my eyes they're all dead. Just happens, you know. Karyl? Music. It's pretty much all I've got beyond this weird hat. Music... right. It's... It's really really... nice music! Uh-huh. Move along, spoony. They better still have my reservation... Hello! My, Chisato, you look lovely tonight. ... Should you be off failing somewhere? But it's such a lovely evening! The White Wolf has a sense for it, you know. The trees, the sky, the keg of Bartweiser... what a wonderful night~ Oh, there you are. I guess I spiked my tea a little too much for you. But that's okay, you can sober up at my house. <3 Aww, that's awfully nice of you to... Uh... Ultros? He's... umm... Shut up. Just... shut up. That's enough of that. We'll see you next week, readers, and I wish you well as I beat the crap out of Odin to avoid mental images! See you later on Behind the Scenes! I hate Finals.